The Gender Inequality Chat by a Bunch of Book Lovers
I don’t remember how long have I been in this Wechat Group, titled Book Exchange Club. Maybe at least 5–6 years ago. I just recently discovered this gem discussion on gender equality/inequality within this group and how very interesting. It dated back early this year in January and was participated by a few group members.
For the sake of each participant’s default rights to remain anonymous and the sake of easy reading, I have blurred their avatars and names with care (sorry if it makes reading a little bit annoying and less tidy).
No spoilers. Now start reading and guess who of these following participants earned my utmost respect. ;)
Final words: as a feminist (born this way, no one converted me), I have been through the phases of feeling bad for men, who I love as deeply as the other female people and criticize as constantly and as harshly as I can.
I know very well that many men are also born to be just what the society, the culture, and political dynamics tell them to be.
Why blame men for behaving like other men? Why stop them from wanting to belong to their men or boys’ club? Why not allow them to man up and be the leaders? Why ruin it when they (at least some of them) have nothing but all the good intentions and when they are actually pretty nice, caring and protective of women, telling women they are beautiful, kind, loving for their roles as mothers, daughters, friends, and families, or just simply strangers? Why stop them from taking care of the finances, walking on the outer side of the road with women, and being themselves? Why be the party-pooper? Why be the grumpy, unpleasant, judgmental woman? Why hate men? (Feminists don’t hate men, I don’t, John doesn’t, we just find some of the men more lovely than the others.）
It’s a hard decision that I choose to make every single day, to not only dare but also insist again and again on telling the men I love, care and respect all my life that despite all the blinded love and care they have for women, they are wrong, indifferent, ignorant and cruel to women for not acknowledging and not fighting with women on these unfortunate inequal conditions.
But I make it every day.
Men must open their eyes, their hearts, and their souls to really see things for what they are and not lie to themselves. No filters, nor wishy-washy thinking.
Sure, there will be hard conversations and verbal fights. Some men’s egos are bound to be bruised. Some men would never come around. If we have to “lose” short term to win long term. Let it be.
Women’s rights are human rights. We are done with excuses. Men need to be a part of this movement. Men need to care.
Be a feminist, and be a better feminist every day.
If John can do it, every man can do it.
